Why Witches?

What's the big deal with Witches?
What did they ever do to Jesus?
Bunch of jerks, those Reformation-era dicks.
Burning, raping, torturing.
No fun.
Why not chill out on the Witches?
They just want to fly around on broomsticks.
Cascade about in the glory of a sunset made of thrill.
But no.
Impotent turd bones have no tolerance for joy.
They go and take it out on the Witches.
They're all like "Joy?Less."
How cool would it be if collective humanity was all like "Suck our dicks."
The coolest.
Reformation-era dicks, ugh.